Tuesday, August 31, 2010
my view at the Mesquite Rodeo. straps of flip flop screaming for dear life.
FAQ's as of late:
Have you had that baby yet? - No. I promise I would tell you if I had.
When exactly are you due? - I swore I would lie when the time came. My plan all along was to stick with "mid-September" but alas I have cracked. I am officially due September 8th. Estimated due date according to 21 week ultrasound September 10th. I am 39 weeks pregnant since last menstrual period as of tomorrow. There, you have specific info.
My only labor thus far not screwed with by impatience, doctors, and pitocin was Ella and I was seven days past my due date.
Have they given you a day/date yet? This one cracks me up and I get it all the time. Some people get the "I am having a homebirth" response. Some people I don't feel like getting into it. I am not being induced - like almost 80% of women are nowadays (so sad, no wonder our C-section rates are 1 in 3 women) I am going with Nature, and no Nature has not given me a date yet. Are you pregnant? Say NO to induction.
Are you dilated? Well lets discuss my cervix why don't we... Moms, sisters and best friends totally ok but random folks who ask about my dilation - hysterical!
My midwife has not checked my dilation - and probably won't. Even though OB/GYN's do tons of vaginal exams starting in the last six weeks of pregnancy - there is really no merit to them. You can be a 'stretchy' four centimeters and not go into labor for weeks (I speak from personal experience) and you can be 0 centimeters and have a baby in a few hours (I do not speak from experience on this one) Checking for dilation just introduces unnecessary germs, and could speed up the start of labor before its time - and if baby is not in the right location: Hello, back labor. So we once again wait for Nature... and if I am in active labor, she may check she may not.... Because the beauty of a midwife and a med free labor is you can push when you feel like pushing. No one needs to know how 'dilated' you are. Some patients of midwives have had their baby without a single vaginal exam.
Are you going to make the school cut off? After four kids, I decided pretty much as soon as I looked up my due date - that I wasn't going to be concerned about birthing before the magical Sep. 1st deadline. I don't need this little one to start school days after he turns five. If I had delivered August 10th - I would still red-shirt him for his first eligible year of kindergarten. An extra year to get ready is a good thing.
Still going with the chosen name? Yes. Parker it is... PJ hasn't quite stuck with anyone but me. Funny thing is Kyle stopped using Parker or PJ the day we officially picked the name. To him unborn son went back to being called just "baby".
Are you going crazy? People really don't ask this too much.. but I pass the days distracting myself with youtube birth videos. This one is my favorite and very inspiring to me:
love her Australian accent.
When I am tired of those, I watch Killers videos... because Brandon Flowers is dreamy:
did you know he is a church member?
Friday, August 27, 2010
While trying to juggle the final payment to the midwife, school supplies, keeping the house stocked with somewhat decent food all the time in case this baby comes, we have discussed the budget even more than usual. That in turn got us talking one night about our early, early married days and Kyle says "how did we make it?" And since he asked that question I have entertained myself for days reminiscing about how we did in fact "make it".
After we got married I insisted that I was moving to Kyle's apartment at Longwood (his college). Even though I'd have to quit my job at the Chinese Restaurant I worked at and I'd have to commute 1 1/2 hours to MCV (my college) for the rest of our final semester. It would have made more sense for me to just stay at my mom's and see him on the weekends, or even gasp... wait until the summer to get married. But it was love. And you can't stop love - or reason with it.
I am glad we made that decision. I LOVED, LOVED, LOVED our short time in that apartment. I got up at four something in the morning so I could make my commute and have enough time to kiss goodbye. We were newlyweds, it could take up to 10 minutes to do that :) My classes got out in the early afternoon. As I drove the LONG commute back to our 'home' I would daydream about having Kyle's babies and fixing him dinner. I was on the cusp of a degree I had dreamed about achieving since I was 11 years old and all I could think about was being barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen cooking dinner for my husband. - Take that feminism.
Sometimes when I didn't have to fill up the tank with gas I would stop at this awesome farmers' market in Amelia county and I would buy us something fresh for dinner. I couldn't afford much but I could make a feast for us with a handful of green beans and two ears of corn.
In the second month things got really, really tight. We begged the landlord to apply Kyle's deposit to our final month's rent. NO LUCK. So we did what others might do but not admit to. We started returning wedding gifts for cash. A very nice lady who I am near positive does not read this blog gave us a butt load of towels from walmart. I wasn't a fan of the pattern so they went back to the store. We thought we had won the lottery when the total cash returned to us was over EIGHTY dollars!!! Those towels helped put gas in my car and fed us for the next two months.
I thought I might repeat the luck one day when I noticed juice concentrate from a local grocery store I was mixing had expired TWO YEARS AGO. I marched myself up there fuming with injustice and planned my hissy fit that would result in the store giving me at least 50 bucks on the spot for my trouble and risked health. No luck that time. I left with less than two dollars. Bummer.
The semester came to an end. We left our humble abode and moved back to Richmond. Without a penny to our names we moved in with my Mom and sister. Kyle fresh with a college degree, stunning grades in a double science major, we proceeded with high hopes. The majority of those hopes were dashed and we set up about other life plans and making ends meet in the mean time.
Since I was waiting on my Occupational Therapy internships to start and he was waiting on other dreams we decided to go the "temp jobs" route so that our schedules would be free when needed. This is where things get comical. We did so many odd jobs, all of which annoyed us while doing them, but all make us laugh now.
I folded GAP t-shirts at a local factory. Think GAP is higher quality so worth the extra 15 bucks? well no. Walmart shirts came off the assembly line, screen prints were exchanged and wah-lah... GAP shirts came off the line. I was a master folder. As long as I could keep my sweat from dripping on the shirts I did great. That was until break time when I literally almost got jumped by the crack addict looking chick who said I was going too fast and I was going to make the job end for everyone if I didn't, and I quote: "slow my white a** down."
When schedules allowed we found jobs we could do together. Most of the time that was "telemarketing". We weren't actually selling anything. It was political phone calls for the Republican party. We made phone calls inviting people to town halls for a presidential hopeful we had never heard of: John McCain. We did surveys about political issues in many states. The worst of which was ALASKA....
If you don't already know Alaska's residents, young and old, receive money each year from oil revenue. Our job a few fateful nights was to call and ask registered voters how they felt about a portion of those profits being invested into education.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN CUSSED AT SO MUCH IN MY LIFE.
seriously. It made me almost miss the crack addict at the t-shirt factory.
Ever want to get your butt chewed out? Pick a random Alaskan phone number and ask how they feel about the government messing with their oil check.
Then one weekend we thought we had a cushy job lined up: Sample giver-outer at Costco. A job normally scooped up by the Elderly with a stool. We thought this will be ok, and the pay was really good for a temp job. I thought cooking little wiener dogs all day would go by quickly too.
We arrived, found out we wouldn't get any stool. And went to pick up our products -- Get this, I got a Brita water pitcher and little cups, and Kyle got a BIG bag of fertilizer.
yep. water and fertilizer. When the lady stepped away, he was like "What the hell am I supposed to do with fertilizer?"
I don't know, tell people about it, I said through muffled laughs.
So we separated to our posts. I gave out little cups of water all day. Remember back in 1999 Brita was still newish and not cheap. Fancy ladies raved about the water quality and listed the numerous reasons to their husbands of why they HAD TO HAVE ONE in their home. Most of the husbands said something to the effect of "tastes just like regular water to me."
It was in the last 15 minutes of my shift when I started to clean up a little bit earlier than necessary when I actually read the full instructions on my brita filter that I realized - the filter I was using had expired about three months previous.
So yeah, I spent all day serving the fine customers of Costco plain tap water. HYSTERICAL.
Take that fancy ladies, the 'delicious' water you were drinking was nothing you couldn't have gotten out of the water fountain.
Kyle on the other hand stayed pretty much miserable the entire time. He had no extra information about the fertilizer other than what was on the bag itself. No coupons to give out. And definitely no samples unless he wanted to poison people.
He was amused a couple of times by some old men who noticed the blaring ridiculous nature of his post. And asked, "What idiot has you standing here doing this?"
Our shifts ended, we got the heck out of dodge and never took another "sample" job again. But we did enjoy the checks when they came. Don't feel bad for the sweet old ladies at Sam's and Costco. Manufacturers PAY REALLY WELL to have someone stand there and feel dumb. And they can do the job that day if they feel like it or they can pass. There is something to be said for flexibility.
Just don't tell the Brita corporation what a bang up job I did that day :)
So how did you survive early marriage? Was it on towels, fertilizer, t-shirts, tap water, and love? Because that is how we made it.
And now I am barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen, exactly where I wanted to be all those years ago. And I LOVE it as much as I daydreamed I would.
**PS. Somewhere along the way we threw caution, good sense, and reason to the wind and threw away my birth control pills. There was a big prayer and little ceremony by the trashcan.
I was pregnant with Benjamin during both of those internships and 9 months pregnant when I sat for my boards.
This post also inspired by this song:
Monday, August 23, 2010
what do you see?
First Day of School 2010 !!!
3rd Grade !
Middle School - 5th Grade !
waiting for the bus and looking at the clouds - what did you see?
(we saw a mermaid)
Maiya was embarrassed by the tag I made her wear. (Younger siblings pick up on the "things to be embarrassed by" a lot sooner than first kids)
love her hands in her pockets.
I almost said "Maiya please don't go", but I restrained myself
Benjamin jumped on before I could snap a picture:
(how cute is Maiya waving at the bus driver?)
Pictures from the girl's meet the teacher night:
Here is to a wonderful school year - hip, hip, hooray!!!!!!!!
got to go make some cookies, and brownies (because that is what Benjamin requested.)
Friday, August 20, 2010
to send your firstborn to middle school. Especially when it feels one year too early (Prosper has moved Fifth grade to middle school to make more room for our booming town in the Elementary schools)
Last night was schedule pick up and locker practice. It was hectic and when he got frustrated and a little embarrassed with with not being able to get the locker open, I seriously thought homeschool was the way to go.
He didn't let me bring the camera last night. "That's embarrassing mom... take pictures with your mind."
Today we made a trip to container store to get some stuff for his locker and we made magnets at home. Then we headed to the school ... to put the new stuff in, but really to practice some more.
Good news is he got the hang of the locker combination. Better news is he let me take pictures this time.
Can't believe I've been blogging since he started kindergarten.
Wednesday, August 18, 2010
Maiya and her 'baby'
ze list. all checked off. finally.
supplies for baby
supplies for mommy
checking out the birth pool
yep that will work.
home visit, listening to the baby :)
37 weeks today - We are very excited. Kyle and I have two more Bradley classes to go. I wish with all my heart that we had taken those classes before Benjamin was born. I wouldn't have agreed to forceps after twenty minutes of pushing. I would have been much more prepared. We do feel a little silly being with 6 other first time parent couples while this is our fifth. But that's ok. I'm doing things the right way this time. Ever have any questions about the following, just pick my brain, I've done more research than is natural or probably necessary:
dangers of pitocin
our nation's outrageous c-section rates
drug free delivery
mother directed pushing
delayed cord clamping
Vit K shot
We really like our midwife. We are praying for a smooth homebirth but have all back up plans in place. So now I wait and 'enjoy' the last little bit of this pregnancy. My feet are puffy and its hot as hell and braxton hicks are annoying, but there is nothing like feeling a little person squirm and kick you from the inside.
Tuesday, August 17, 2010
Did you know it was National Women's Self Appreciation day? yeah me either... but since I've seen this on a couple blogs I thought I'd give it a go myself:
What I love about me:
I am generally a happy person. My patriarchal blessing says "Be of good cheer, our Father in Heaven has much joy for you in this life" Despite the trials, this statement is sooo true. And what do they say anyway? 'you are usually as happy as you are in the habit of being"
I am not timid. Nervous Nellie? sometimes, but I am not timid - I get the job done. I'll introduce myself first. I'll talk to the manager. I'll make ten calls. I'll write letters. I make demands when appropriate. Like a dog after a bone.
I am frugal. You guys knew that. I am not embarrassed to shop thrift stores for just about anything. I am always thinking of ways to save money. If you ask me about that cool new restaurant chances are good I won't know a thing about it. I value experience over 'things'.
I am a good tipper. You may think this is a straight contradiction to the previous statement and it may be. Honestly I avoid service that requires tipping to be frugal often. I steam my own carpets (mostly). I pick up the pizza instead of having it delivered. BUT, when I do get work done for me I try really hard to tip well. I've had those jobs and I know what its like.
I like my hair. I didn't for many years, Curly is a state of being I have come to know and I appreciate my attitude that curls out of the top of my head. Sure Kyle doesn't really know what its like to run his fingers through his woman's hair. But its spunky and I love it. 'cept when I don't and I put it in a ponytail :)
I am passionate. When I love you I really LOVE you. When I care, I REALLY care. When you make me mad you REALLY make me mad. I will fight tooth and nail for any cause that I support.
I have good self esteem. Not easily said for all the big beautiful women out there. I love my body, with it: I snuggle. I make love. I birth and breastfeed my babies. I work. I think. I read. I see. I hear. I hug my children and kiss their boo-boos. I try to think less about the fact that I am not the same size as most women. I won't spend time berating myself for that. I focus on health and fun. Those two things are more important to me that what the tag in my clothes say.
I have faith. Faith in God. Faith in the Gospel. Faith in the future.
I love that I am a wife. And I try to be a good one.
I love that I am a mom:
retro shot of me 'the mom'.
So, How about you?? what do you love about yourself?
Thursday, August 12, 2010
I love google calendar - its where this to-do list resides.
put away clothes boxes DONE
clean master bathroom DONE
clean computer desk 1/2 Done
organize game closet DONE
register kids DONE
get organized for RS meeting DONE
schedule VT DONE
clean under and around washer and dryer
birth supplies DONE
Clean and organize Pantry
food handout DONE
curtains in kitchen
dust all blinds
Wash and put away baby clothes
new filter in fridge
deal with ins about birth!!
place of service - home
physician fees - 80% in network, 60% out of network
1000 per person deductible in network
2000 deductible out of network
B + E school shoes
see? I haven't fallen off the face of the earth... I'm here with 4 kiddos in the heat of summer and in the middle of baby preparations.
We get a few things done, swim A LOT, laze around some more. I am not taking near enough pictures...
but I'll get back into the swing of things. Little over a week till school starts. Can't believe Maiya will be starting kindergarten. I won't be participating in the boo-hoo breakfast. I don't do those things. It makes my head hurt because I'll roll my eyes so much at these overbearing Texas moms.
I will make First day of school cookies, because that is what I do. And for first day of school cookies I'll make whatever they want, and if that means three different kinds of cookies than so be it. I get teary eyed thinking that one day I'll ship 'first day of school' cookies to some college or mission...
Haven't I mentioned lately that I am very happy?
Long to-do lists, cooking, cleaning, heat and pregnancy, fighting kids, sticky toddler, a five year old hoarder, messy house no matter what, waiting for my man to get home, tight budget, etc, etc.... Its all exactly what I want to be doing right now, and I love it.