I thought all morning about entering this contest. Check it out, its a great idea. I found out about it through Abby who is HYSTERICALLY funny. I too couldn't think of anything to write. Then the following occurred. All of it is sadly true. Just ask Nancy she was there! As they say: You can't make this stuff up!
Farts, Cigarettes, and Cub Scouts
Scene one:
Rush in to the dollar store to grab a few things, notice Halloween candy on sale - grab an innocent bag of candy for cub scouts. Spiderman theme. This should work.
Scene two:
Overcrowded Cub meeting in full swing. At a crowded table of boys someone rips a good one. I mean a good -- one! My son looks up with redness in his cheeks. Laughter ensues as well as the "it wasn't me" chorus. Guilt is firmly placed on Benjamin. He looks up and says a little too nonchalantly "It wasn't me it was my Mom" ............................ WHAT?.................................
Yep my son just blamed his fart on me. When I gave birth to him I looked at his little face and knew I would do ANYTHING for him. Little did I know that meant taking blame for his fart in public eight years later. Then he gave me that look, the "please bail me out mom" look, so I did what any loving mother would do ... I said "oh e x c u s e m e?" The words were drawn out because I truly did not know what was better for my son: make him take the blame or be the kid of the farting mom. Dr. Sears doesn't have this dilemma in any of his books.
Yep my son just blamed his fart on me. When I gave birth to him I looked at his little face and knew I would do ANYTHING for him. Little did I know that meant taking blame for his fart in public eight years later. Then he gave me that look, the "please bail me out mom" look, so I did what any loving mother would do ... I said "oh e x c u s e m e?" The words were drawn out because I truly did not know what was better for my son: make him take the blame or be the kid of the farting mom. Dr. Sears doesn't have this dilemma in any of his books.
Scene Three:
The Cub scout meeting closes. Said candy is passed around. Impulse buy quickly regretted when I realize amongst snickers of fellow leaders that I had brought candy cigarettes to the church building for scout night. Although nowadays they are not technically candy cigarettes they are "Candy sticks" and the tips aren't painted red anymore so they just look like joints. So there I was in the midst of 12 boys at church in cub scout uniforms with joints hanging out of their mouths.
I may be the farting mom, but I deliver on the goods!
The Cub scout meeting closes. Said candy is passed around. Impulse buy quickly regretted when I realize amongst snickers of fellow leaders that I had brought candy cigarettes to the church building for scout night. Although nowadays they are not technically candy cigarettes they are "Candy sticks" and the tips aren't painted red anymore so they just look like joints. So there I was in the midst of 12 boys at church in cub scout uniforms with joints hanging out of their mouths.
I may be the farting mom, but I deliver on the goods!
Does anyone smell something?
aka. cub scout joints 
10 comments:
Oh Janie, Janie. That was great!!
Opening up the "joint candy" was such a memorable scouting moment. Dang, I missed the farting episode.
Oh, way too funny. Makes me kinda miss cub scouts.
OK. I'm over it!
But I still would have loved to see you take credit for the fart and then hand out the pot. I mean the candy sticks.
oh, hi, janie. dan and laurie udy are me signed in on my sil's account. whoops! but look at the cute picture of my darling neice...
LOL!!! Oh My Gosh!!! What a mom! Not only taking the blame, but supplying the goods. Priceless.
only sister O would bring pot to scouts :D and let one rip!!! i bet your were dying-- i would have been. hilarious!!
Oh Janie-
I have tears in my eyes from that laugh. Thanks for sharing! You are so awesome for taking the fall for the fart....someday you'll laugh about that with Benjamin and his wife!
HA! Do it, do it, do it, do it.
Janie, that was a great story! I am craking up! I wish I could have been there! Way to take the blame of the fart - you're a better mother than I would have been at that moment! ;)
You'll get him back later when you're old and you have the walking farts. I wouldn't have taken the blame, though. That's not under the Mom job description. The candy cigs are pretty funny.
HAHA! so funny!!!
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