Its not that hard to understand. Its really not.

Well I can't stop myself today...
The New York Times is hosting a debate on the what the age of consent for circumcision should be.

Reading it all is so disturbing to me even though I would say the bulk of information is in favor of boys rights.

I am very active on a few groups concerning this issue and every once in a while we get a person who "likes" the group so they can come in with guns-a-blazing and correct us on our ignorance.
It would be comical to me if I didn't think that this means they are vehemently defending cutting an infant's genitals. And its funny to me because if they think they'll join a group of intactivists that are all just hippies going on gut instinct alone then they are sorely mistaken.

You will rarely meet a group that has so intensely studied a topic from all angles. Many of us have read the scientific abstracts on all the studies done in Africa. We've listened to HOURS of podcasts (me). We have watched circumcisions of every method, thumbed through all the pages of pictures of botched jobs. We study normal anatomy and the actual situations that intact children and men run into and the chances of real problems and mythical problems.

So walking into our cyber living room and saying with authority:


"Don't you idiots know its cleaner to be circumcised?"

Ain't going to do a dang thing. You think we'll just grasp at something to cover our face and shut down all our operations?

yeah I don't think so.

As much as I would love for two thoughts to end it all, it never does. But it should - It should go like this:

HIS BODY HIS CHOICE...
why yes that makes sense I never thought of letting him decide before... or
Any thing that includes the following:
-strapping down
-non consenting individual
-cutting/removing
-healthy tissue
-genitals
-infant
Just let that word cloud sink into your brain. We should all be appalled. No debate needed.

But I will address the most common things we hear:

It is not mutilation.
I do tend to avoid this term when trying to educate anyone on the subject, its loaded and divisive and I'm more about saving babies than just pissing folks off, BUT.. If you claim this word doesn't fit I have to point out the errors of your ways.  Its a classic case of degenerative semantics - we use the word for more than its actual definition so when one says mutilation you might be prone to think of some SAW horror film. The actual definition is this:
MUTILATION. 1. : deprivation of a limb or essential part especially by excision

The confusion might come in the word essential. If one knows about the foreskin the number of erogenous nerve endings it has, how it protects the glans from dirt and keeps it moist like it is supposed to be, you consider it an essential part.

And therefore, male circumcision is mutilation. I'm sorry but it just is. I am sure you would agree that the term fits for female circumcision as well.

Its TOTALLY different from female circumcision
This one really gets me fired up. I am JUST AS OPPOSED to female circumcision as I am male - but nothing gets me angrier than saying female circ is abominable and male circ is a-ok.

There are four to five classifications of circumcision for males and females.  The exact definitions vary depending on the source.

For females the most common is removal of part or all of the clitoral hood, and next up is removal of some or all of of the clitoris. The most extreme is complete excision of ALL external genitalia - a very, very rare practice.


Male circumcision also has classifications in various levels of extreme.
The first being simple bloodletting of a couple of drops from a nick in the foreskin to removal of what little foreskin hangs past the glans.


Then the most common which is what we do everyday in this country - the ripping of the foreskin from the glans and cutting ALL of the foreskin away. The most severe male circumcision which could be compared to the most severe form for females is either castration or a practice done in Aboriginal cultures where the penis is cut from the urethra to scrotum as described here: 


Another harsh ritual, subincision, was practiced primarily among Australian aborigines and on a few Pacific Islands. It consisted of a cutting open of the urethra on the underside of the penis down to as far as near the scrotum; the subincision ritual was generally preceded by a circumcision ritual (from here)

So when you are going to truly compare apples to apples in regard to female and male circumcision the most common are BOTH removal of the prepuce aka the foreskin. Why then do we have a visceral reaction to female cutting but not male??
Even when the entire clitoris is removed (which breaks my heart). Its is removing 8000 nerve endings. The majority of the clitoris is not actually external. Circumcised females still self report sexual satisfaction and ability to orgasm.
Our cultural version of male circumcision removes 20,000 nerve endings. Males still report sexual satisfaction too. But sensitivity tests demonstrate reduced sensitivity and with age many lose ability to maintain erections or orgasm due to rapid desensitization at the scar site.

"but female circumcision is about power/control/and negatively effecting the sexual pleasure of women."

well,
Females are often the ones in such cultures to promote and carry out the circumcisions.
Sound familiar since many men are most vocal about continuing the practice in ours and most circumcisors are male?
And male circumcision was promoted in this country as a way to curb undue sexual appetite and masturbation. Even ancient Jewish texts described the practice as beneficial because men would be more drawn to spiritual study than sexual pursuits if they were properly circumcised.

Being against the female circumcision and FOR male circumcision is cultural and religious elitism.

It doesn't hurt the baby. Mine cried more at his fill in the blank (shots, first hair cut, when his cord was cut, etc.)
I only have two rebuttals to this:
1. Bullcrap.
2. Even when baby sleeps through it, is actually properly numbed (rare), cries more at something else, etc. It does not all of sudden make removing a healthy body part without consent of the owners OK. It will never be ok to me.
** side note though, they started an experiment to actually see if sugar water (commonly the only relief to infants) was a help or not, but then quickly stopped the experiment because they said the markers of distress for infants were so high its was ethically wrong to continue the study and since then have suggested actual pain relief in its various forms be offered to every infant undergoing this procedure.
Yet many are still not offered anything to this day. Including all the circs done by the Mohel I just protested against.

Yeah tell that to the 14, 30, 50, 80 year old I knew that HAD to have it done because of: phimosis, infection, adhesion, embarrassment,etc. 
We get this one a lot. And this is the sad issue of the matter here:
There has sadly existed and continues to persists a deal of shame surrounding being intact. Imagine the angst any man has about his manhood. Let that developing adolescent here one joke or snide remark about an uncircumcised penis being gross and I can understand them wanting to change that fact. No one wants to fear never being sexually accepted. I understand.
It does not change my position though. A man who had the procedure done later in life had a few things an infant didn't:
-The right to education.
-The right to consent
-The right to adequate pain relief both before and during
-The right to cleanliness while healing since most grown men aren't in diapers
-Surgery on a fully developed penis. With an infant is just an educated shot in the dark how much should be removed. Often they are wrong - just google botched circumcisions to see what I am talking about.
The other issue is doctors just don't know a lot about the intact penis. No medical texts use pictures of intact men. Medical school rarely addresses the foreskin. Most doctors themselves are cut.
If there is the slightest problem the solution is circumcision. That rarely means it was actually necessary.

My brother had it done as an adult and it hurt for three weeks, do it when they are a baby it doesn't hurt as much.
This may be an argument for you to circumcise a baby, but for me it is the opposite. The only difference in this situation is that the grown man could tell you how much it hurt and the baby couldn't.  Scientist even admit they can't properly rate pain for an infant and pain relief is dangerous in such a small baby. So this solidifies my opinion that we should not be doing this to infants. Add to that do you know how much blood loss it takes for a baby to die? 2.3 ounces. That is it.  That is not even enough to leak through one diaper before a baby could die from blood loss. Here I will show you pictures to demonstrate (taken from Drmomma.org)

 this is a tiny shot glass barely an amount there, completely contained in one diaper:

And this is not as rare as you would think: Medics consider banning circumcision after baby boy dies


You know when they are elderly they won't get cleaned as well in a nursing home?
Well I worked in a nursing home and I cleaned men and women and I feel especially qualified to answer this one, and its as simple as this:
If a nursing home can not handle cleaning an intact man you can bet your bottom dollar they can not handle a labia and its not a nursing home you want a person at. Period.
What do people picture the loch ness monster down there? I mean come on. Even if this were a real issue. Yes, Yes by all means cut your infant son's genitals because maybe in like 80 years he may be in a nursing home. I mean really???


Eww. Do it now their wife will thank you.
Well intact is officially the majority. So women hoping for only cut men start rethinking that now. Moms teach your daughters to be accepting and if you know the purposes of the foreskin be very happy for them that they will have the possibility of an INTACT sexual life - the benefits for women are strong.
On behalf of my daughters please don't cut your son. He deserves better and my daughters deserve better.

As far as women who really won't go for it. Sounds like the perfect filter for getting shallow ignorant women out of your life especially before they become your spouse.

As far as projecting your sexual preference onto your infant. That is just... well creepy.

He will never get "x" from a woman. (X is any number of sexual favors)
See above for filter removing shallow ignorant people from your life. And at the end of the day, Genitals are genitals - keep it clean treat the person you love right and they will do the same for you.

He will be made fun of in the locker room.
A big ol' helping of puhleese on this one:
1. Intact is much more common and for babies born now the majority. So your cut son might be asked "why exactly did your parents pay to make your penis smaller?"
2. Ummm what year did they stop building group showers in gyms? Or locker rooms without stalls. Keep your privates private.
3. Even when that is not an option I hear on good word from many men that there is firm don't look at any one's junk and DEFINITELY don't comment on it rule going on.
4. If that does still happen saying "why are looking at my package man" at the top of your lungs is very very powerful in a group of adolescents.

We want him to match his father./ I don't have a penis so I defaulted to my husband on this one./ I didn't want to, but my husband did so I had him circumcised out of respect for my husband.
1. Tackle this with sensitivity. I've said it before discussing the risks and outcomes of circumcision with your circumcised husband needs care and tact.
2. The fact is if your husband is circ'd, he doesn't have a foreskin. You do. So even though you are female you still are better equipped to know the joys of having your whole body.
3. You are the mother. Protect your baby. Educate your husband.  - The first is more important.

I'm Christian and God said to do it.
Please read your scriptures better. Along with eye for an eye and all that jazz Jesus Christ's actions ended the need for circumcision and its spoken pretty often and against the practice in the New Testament.

I'm Jewish and God said to do it.
Watch the documentary Cut: The Film.
Abrahamic circumcision is very, very different than what is done to boys now.
Will God really punish a man for a decision that his parents abstained from?
more info here: http://www.jewsagainstcircumcision.org/

• Andre Gorelkin
• New York

NYT Pick

FLAG

I am a circumcised jew. I have a son who is also a circumcised jew.

If I had it to do all over again, i would not have circumcised my son. There is no valid, medical reason for the procedure. Any permanent alteration of a boys body should be decided by the boy when he is old enough to decide such things for himself.

This ruling does not infringe on anyone's religion. One may still believe whatever they want. And the boys can decide to make this "covenant" themselves when they are adults. Incidentally, Abraham was not circumcised as a child. He did it to himself as a grown man. God still seemed to think he was righteous enough nonetheless.

To those who think they should be able to do whatever they want to infants in the name of their beliefs I ask this: If a religion has a tradition of cutting off the earlobes of babies, would they support the practice? There is no function for the earlobe. So why not let them be removed?

My doctor says its better and healthier and I trust him more than you.
Well I wonder where your doctor worship will get you? I am sorry but I can't compete with an idol like that, but I can tell you where to find information - whether you partake is up to you.
Since doctors are often the ones using myths over facts I am hesitant to trust any doctor.
There are Doctors opposing circumcision.
And there is NO MEDICAL ORGANIZATION that supports routine infant circumcision. Some default to parental decision but I suspect that is politically based.
I can direct you to doctors and nurses testimony begging parents to stop asking them to do this to babies.

from here

A nurse sent the above image and told her side of things, things she can't say openly at her place of employment: 

Parents don't see this sickening thing and I wish they could - it is like something out of a horror movie. Parents are told that the babies barely notice and sometimes don't cry at all - this is an absolute blatant lie. They are also told that pain relief will be provided, but are never informed that all the 'pain relief' babies receive is an infant's Tylenol and a pacifier dipped in sugar water. 


An hour before circumcision, babies are denied any breastfeeding (or formula) so they do not vomit and choke when they scream. So sometimes they are already crying and upset before they are taken to be cut because they are so hungry. Babies are returned to their parents when they have passed out and they will not wake up to eat for many hours after circumcision. When they do wake, they are immensely hungry and in terrible pain. 


I could go on and on... It is the worst part of my job as a pediatric nurse by far. And it happens every single morning.

One nurse said every time she brings a baby boy back to his mom she wants to scream at the top of her lungs "Do you realize what you just made me do?"

I want actual FACTS and no crap from the internet. That doesn't count.

Well I am sorry to inform you that most information in 2012 has moved to the big bad internet and that even most medical studies and abstracts are on the net as well. And I am just sure that if you are opposed to clicking on a link you will go buy a book or check one out at the library, but if that is what you will listen to then here are some great ones:
Marked in the Flesh by Leonard B. Glick
What your doctor may not tell you about circumcision by Paul M. Fleiss
As Nature Made Him by John Colapinto


Am I missing anything? Any lingering thoughts/questions? Any argument that you think actually justifies doing this to babies?

I'm all ears.

Apology from Family Physician who did circumcisions:

totally random thoughts

in no particular order

lately I have been thinking about wiping out my blog - not stop blogging just erasing the past. Printing it out for me and taking it away from the internet.

so much of my thoughts and opinions are drastically different from what I have espoused in the past. Some of it embarrasses me, well not really since its really, really hard to embarrass me since I decided to generally stop caring what other people think.

i consider separating my rants from my family stuff - but then I think why? I rant to my family why can't I rant on my family blog?

there has been so much in da news lately that I want to add my commentary to, but I suspect it will drain my time so I don't. But here are some articles I have a lot to say about:

Germany court rules circumcision an assault on boys

An ethicist take on that ruling: Religion is no excuse to mutilate your baby's penis.


Will we ever be enlightened enough to stop inductions?

This is NOT what I think feminism is

Declaration of independence from dieting

Homebirths are cost effective (er duh)


How to scare women about homebirths by relying heavily on one fanatic (or how to be a crappy journalist)

and today:

bad title because incurable makes it sound like a death sentence - but the article is the honest truth:

Fat is officially incurable


And... on a more serious note this blogger tackles some very tough issues that have bruised my soul as of late but it makes me feel good to know I am not the only faithful member who thinks this way (these are well researched posts from a believing member lest you think otherwise) Links are in purple, italics are his writings - his post are very long not unlike a great book:

Is this hurting the church?

In 1961 Church headquarters announced a new program that it called “Correlation.” This new way of doing things was introduced in conference by apostle Harold B. Lee. It was described as a benefit, sold as a way to coordinate and unify all the various programs of the church.

What it ended up being was a stifling means of control, not only of individual wards, but also of many individual members. The policies of correlation took decades to fully implement, and most of us didn't even notice the subtle changes

Problems with general conference (that story from the prez made me scratch my head too)
Imagine one of these foreigners watching a conference session for the very first time, and later relating this information to a friend who missed it:

“Praise Allah! I saw The Prophet of the Lord on TV yesterday.”

“Oh yes? What did this holy man have to say?”

“He said there was this time he was at a meeting and God told him to announce a particular man was to be the speaker, but that man was not even at the meeting.  Then, just when all hope is lost, the guy shows up.”

“That is indeed a miracle. What else did this prophet have to say?”

“He said that when he was a young boy he accidently left a five dollar bill in his pants pocket, and the pants went to the laundry.  He prayed mightily to the Lord that when he got the pants back, the money might still be in the pocket.”

“What happened?”

“When the pants came back from the laundry, the money was still in the pocket.”

“Wow. Nothing like that has ever happened to me.”

And this one is especially poignant to Kyle and I:

Go ahead and skip that temple wedding.

It was of such importance to Joseph Smith that weddings not be held in secret that the policy was codified in the Doctrine and Covenants:

“All marriages in this church of Christ of Latter Day Saints,” the scripture stated, “should be solemnized in a public meeting, or feast, prepared for this purpose..."

“...The persons to be married,” are to be “standing together, the man on the right, and the woman on the left...” 

really all of his top posts are dang near brilliant and if he taught gospel doctrine I'd be in the first row every sunday and pick his brain after!!!!


moving on,

I regret cutting off most of my hair.

I hate putting on sunscreen

I hate putting sunscreen on wiggling kids.

I love watermelon with salt on it.

I love the lazy days of summer.

Yet I have a couple of big projects to tackle and want to get a head start on school stuff.

three kids in tree different schools this year will be interesting.

Sometimes I want to move and ask Kyle late at night if he's on board with that. Then we both talk me out of it.

I have had no dreams about the baby. but I am kind of thinking girl.

we still can't decide on a boy name.

we are still seriously considering dropping health insurance, which clouds my political opinion on all that national healthcare stuff lately - the bottom line is I just don't care anymore. conservatives don't seem to have the guts to fix what we have so I guess the liberals will get it successfully handed over to Uncle Sam so he can screw it up. Either way we are screwed at this point.

I don't like Romney.

I think I might be a libertarian.

I'll go have some more watermelon.

Herbal Chai Tea

Have you had some Chai lately? No? 

You should, its good for your soul.

Its one of my favorite things, so like Oprah I shall share my recipe.

Chai (pronounced as a single syllable and rhymes with 'pie') is the word for tea in many parts of the world. It is a centuries-old beverage which has played an important role in many cultures.

Chai from India is a spiced milk tea that has become increasingly popular throughout the world. It is generally made up of:

 rich black tea 

 (mine is herbal)

 heavy milk

 a combination of various spices

 a sweetener

Besides the benefit of no caffeine, the herbal variety of Chai is significantly cheaper.

I use Celestial Seasonings Bengal Spice: 

"Brimming with cinnamon, ginger, cardamom and cloves, a cup of our aromatic Bengal Spice^® tea is like a trip to an exotic spice market in a faraway land. This adventurous blend is our caffeine-free interpretation of Chai, a piquant Indian brew traditionally made with black tea. Try Bengal Spice with milk and sugar for a true Chai experience."

Ingredients:

Cinnamon, roasted chicory, roasted carob, natural spice and vanilla flavors with other natural flavors, ginger, cardamom, black pepper, cloves and nutmeg.

Four to five bags for 1 quart of boiling water

I leave to steep until its cool enough for me to put my (clean) hands in the water

This got left overnight - just because

Squeeze out the bags (without busting them)

Add the amount of sweetener you like (somewhere between 1/3 cup to full cup is good - I did little over 1/2 cup sugar)

** Now this is your Chai syrup. You can stop here and leave it - just make a cup at a time, adding equal amounts of milk to syrup - heat up again if you prefer it hot, we drink it iced.

I just go ahead an add 1 quart of soy milk at this point (I think it tastes better with soy milk, but any milk of your choice will do... cow, almond, rice, breastmilk (just kidding)...

It turns this beautiful caramel color

And then pour over ice. Heaven in a glass.

If I don't have chai, I'll crai.

(that line stolen from my friend Robert)

Maiya is SEVEN

Are YOU a model mother? a list...

While going through my mother's things I came across some interesting stuff that my grandmother was sent home from the hospital with upon the birth of my mother in 1953. There are so many head-scratchers that I may have to just make this into a series, starting with this gem -

a list ...

a list just in case you were ever wondering....

Are YOU a model mother?

(my comments are in italics) The rest is, as God is my witness, actually published materials for new mothers, I swear to you.

You ARE a model mother if:

• You make every effort to regain an attractive figure. (Yes this is THE most important thing and the first thing you should be concerned about, who cares about taking care of the actual baby or your health its JUST about how you look.)
• You wear a properly fitted foundation to help stretched muscles back into place. (Again ladies looks, looks, looks - if your body for shame does not leave the hospital rock solid you better find a girdle and QUICK!)
• You faithfully do any exercises your doctor may prescribe. (hmmmm ... still no mention of the baby you just birthed - put on that girdle and do some sit ups damnit! Right now, I MEAN IT)
• You regularly swallow those pills and medicines the doctor wants you to take to build yourself up. (What exactly are these happy pills? You don't need to worry your little head about what you are putting in your body - just take the pills the nice doctor gave you... they are probably diet pills - but remember your looks are the most important thing.)
• You make time for that little daily nap until you are 100% back on your feet. (But only after your exercises and your pills)
• You remember the people who took such good care of you at the hospital with a little card of remembrance. (Of course because you have nothing better to do - nothing like buying a girdle, exercsing or taking care of a baby - where is that baby anyway?)
• You take baby to his regular doctor's visits. (No mention of bonding or feeding, just take it to the doctor, on time, and write thank  you notes as soon as you get home.)
• You put baby's valuable birth records in a really safe place. (After the thank you notes, and pills, and exercise, keep up on your filing sister.)
• You remember that Hubby is still a member of the family. (By golly this is not all about you - take care of that man will you.)
• You let Dad pitch in with some of the nursery tasks. ('Let him' that is, sure as heck don't expect it. And if he does change a diaper, as always my dear, a thank you note ok?)
• You maintain your old outside interests and activities. (Do not, I repeat DO NOT let the garden club or bridge club down - they are depending on you.)
• You find enough time each day to keep your home neat, tidy,and fresh. (Run while you clean and that might count as some of your exercise, But make sure to wear your girdle and heels lest you neglect the Hubby.)
• You still make tasty and appetizing meals for the breadwinner to come home to. (Now there were no microwaves then and frozen dinners were not for "model mothers" so that cooked from scratch meal better be tasty AND appetizing!)
• You don't let your newly added duties prevent you from careful grooming and dressing. (My, my have we not covered this yet. It is not about the happiness of your baby, the health of your child... it is all I repeat ALL about how you look and you better look ah-mazing - Or we come and take away your model mother badge immediately.)
• You find time to talk about something else besides the baby when friends come to call. (I mean for real, because they came to see how great you look, not to hear about a stupid baby - or how all of this might be the slightest bit overwhelming for you.)
• You want to have another baby one of these days soon. (I had to laugh/cry for a good ten minutes after this one... because as much fun as this list has been you should want to experience this post-partum joy of girdles, pills, exercise, cooking, thank you notes, appointments, house-cleaning, hair curling joy at least every year and half for all of your child-bearing years!!)

The very next time you are with a women who delivered a child in the 1950s give her a BIG HUG. 

She deserves it.

Things I will do different this time

Now that I am not so sick I can start planning a bit - PJ's birth was darn near perfect but I still have those things that I think to myself I would do differently.

We are not finding out the gender - Oh yeah I already said that. And I do have to say buying new gender neutral stuff has been fun! I am wondering if not knowing will make me actually cry at the birth? I don't have that female thing of happy crying all that much. Sometimes it makes me feel like I have the wrong reaction to certain events - but its just me.

I will PLAN on being way overdue and relish the last bit of pregnancy.

I am NOT getting my membranes stripped. I've read too much now and understand the risks and I don't think it helps anyway.

I don't "think" I will even get checked at those last one or two prenatal visits, but maybe I will - we'll see. I am hoping to resist the urge.

I was really hoping for significantly LESS prenatal visits but that makes the midwife uncomfortable so I chose not to push that battle.

Have been debating about Kyle and I being solo - even getting the midwife to stay in the neighboring room - but this decision is still in discussion.

** Except for, we WILL have a birth photographer this time.

Operation AFTERPAINS....

ooooo boy those hurt like crazy! I am going to try just about everything on this list, but I am most looking forward to stomach binding. I don't know how to approach it - but after PJ I felt like my insides were just going to roll forward right out of me - I said it was "tender" to the midwife when she asked but really I HATED that feeling. I said I needed advil and she said they shouldn't be that strong, I said "oh OK" then popped three advil the minute she left LOL
The loosey goosey feeling was so weird, like I almost wanted to put on spanx - who ever wants to put those on?

I don't know what kind of wrap I'll use but I'm researching.

I am going to FORCE myself to take it easier in the first week after birth. After Cora I was out on the town in like 3 nights and was rather happy to be. But now I know how fast and precious those newbie minutes fly and I am going to try to do what the midwives say and stay in bed for one week. We shall see!

Staying home does seem to help me avoid mastitis - and I really, really want to avoid that!

Its amazing to me that while I should be well accustomed to this, its always super exciting and a bit overwhelming to plan your life for a new baby.

Happy Father's Day

Having a child is surely the most beautifully irrational act that two people in love can commit. - Bill Cosby

You are one amazing Dad. We love you TONS and TONS!

Happenings & On my bookshelf

 26 weeks and I can finally, finally say I am no longer nauseous. 

 Summer is here!

 Kyle surprised me with tickets to the 25th anniversary performance of Phantom of the Opera at Prince Albert Hall broadcast at cinemark - Amazing - and the movie theater experience was cool views you couldn't even get from first row and great acoustics

 Started "carding" aka leaving information about not circumcising in places where new mothers might find it: pregnancy tests, expectant mom parking, in pregnancy books, stuffed in layette items, near prenatal vitamins - can you think of any other good places?

 Been going through room by room and purging/cleaning/painting/shampooing carpets or some combo thereof 

 Best Buds said goodbye, Houston bound, many tears shed!

Saw Baby Boo - DID NOT find out gender, didn't even peek. 

_________________________________________________________

What I've been reading:

 A book of LOCAL birth stories that benefits the Tarrant County Birth Network. It was fabulous. I go this Saturday to a start up meeting for the Dallas County Birth Network... Maybe one day I'll spear-head a Collin County Birth Network? We shall see...

 This is about circumcision, of course, and is fascinating. Did you know ancient circumcision was NOTHING like what we do today. It was much more conservative from ritual bloodletting to just a nick in the foreskin or removal of what extended beyond the glans. Then in the Hellenic period when Jewish men wanted to get into the Olympics (it was naked remember and considered indecent for your glans to be exposed) they would "restore" their foreskin by either manipulating it down or stretching it with weights. This upset the Jewish leaders so they started removing ALL of the foreskin from there on out. A practice John Kellogg (yes the cereal guy - he was a certifiable nutcase) pushed in America from a medical standpoint to reduce masturbation addictions.  And now you know the rest of the story as Paul Harvey would say.

Got this to inspire me to try all sorts of homemade bread making feats. It looks hard and my motivation has waned.

 A fun read. I think my husband has every single book Stephen King has ever written and every once in a while I pick up and try the ones I haven't already read myself.

 I could have TOTALLY wrote this. Meaning I didn't learn tons of new stuff but I still thoroughly enjoyed reading it - she has a great sense of humor. Something every parent of a big family MUST have.

This book has been utterly fascinating. It uses the massive information gathered through eight decades of the Terman study and provides easy to read user friendly 'advice' I guess you would say.  I love that each chapter basically tells you what can shorten your life span then ends with a paragraph on why you shouldn't be too concerned about it. 

Loved the chapter on exercise. I won't spoil it but I bet it won't be what you are expecting to hear.

And the number one predictor of shorter lifespan?

Parental divorce in childhood.

see? like I said - 

interesting.

I feel a full blown temper tantrum coming

Our home computer died. Like totally kicked the bucket. We have backed up files but I can't find the card reader to put my pictures on the laptop - hence no post for Ben's birthday - still.

A second hospital bill came putting the grand total for PJ's SIX FREAKING STITCHES - that were done poorly from a Physician Assistant with the WORST bedside manner ever to 1608.27. He has to do ER, his personality would not fly elsewhere! That means it was almost $300 per stitch. Add that to $600 for flu trip for two, and the $150 bug in ear and the $1500 I still owe midwife.

Dear Oyakawa children:


Next person to need stitches is getting super glue and steri-strips on the kitchen table. End of story.


Love,
Mom and Dad.

Seriously that is so much BS,because it is after our insurance! My midwife charges just at little more than double that for ALL prenatal care AND the delivery AND follow up care.

And speaking of this insurance. We pay five hundred dollars a month for insurance with a $6000 deductible per family (no individual deductible and $12,000 out of network) Meaning we pay $500 a month to pay for ALL of our healthcare out of pocket.  Kyle wants to drop and go sans insurance. I am thinking I might start to be on board with that plan.

In other news. Our van suffered some serious tire blow-out, bent expensive stuff, issues and today the shop called saying their original estimate was rather low - just take that number and double it will be more like it.

My mom needs major surgery. And I am worried about her and annoyed that her doctors can't get the act together.

I just spent an hour taking apart my carpet shampooer to shampoo the carpets I:
1. don't want anymore because I REALLY, REALLY want hardwood.
2. if I have to have them I'd rather a hired professional shampoo them.

After said hour the damn thing still doesn't work!

And my best friend is moving away.

so excuse me if I blubber on the floor for a while.

the dirty floor that is.

Its a good thing I'm mormon AND pregnant or I'd try one of those strong drinks I keep hearing so much about.

If I designed children's clothes.

* There would be NO cartoon characters or other overt advertising on anything.
*Beading and glitter and other doo-dads would be few and far between.
*Only the rarest of wording would make it onto clothing. NO words on butts. Ever.
*Everything would be wrinkle free. everything - Please for the love especially girls dresses. I hate ironing, I really, really hate ironing little itty bitty dresses - with bows to boot.
*All tops would match all bottoms. Everything would be interchangeable!
*Pants and shorts would be gender neutral so hand me downs for either gender would be a-ok. Little girl jeans do NOT need to always include bedazzling or a bow.
*Shorts would be a little bit longer. Its hard to find kid shorts that are actually finger tip length (especially for girls).
*Sizing would be at least somewhat uniform. How come my kids can wear anything in a size range of 2 or 3 sizes up or down of their actual size?
*There would be magical socks that fit EVERYONE in the family and hence no more matching socks, just grab two, any two.
*Shoes: classy sandals with dirt colored soles to avoid the dirty toe prints that show up second week of summer. Sturdy church shoes - why do church shoes seem to disintegrate rapidly? Tennis shoes without glitter for girls or camo for boys.
*Bathing suits will no longer pill on the butt even if they drag their behinds across concrete for hours.

And that my folks is the dream wish list for clothing of a mother of five.

** my kids clothing breaks every one of these rules.

Inspired by this post at Renegade Mothering (one of my new fav blogs) *language warning

23 weeks and the great mystery...

Though it seems strange to say...

I've never been laid so low

In such a mysterious way...

The mother and child reunion 

Is only a motion away

Mother and Child Reunion by Paul Simon

The baby is the size of a mango. And when a mango kicks your bladder - you know it!

I am over halfway and in that period that I struggle with the most. I am 'better'. This bout with hyperemesis was... tough. It always is though. I got better sooner but it has lingered longer - if that makes sense. The other morning I missed breakfast in a rush to get to Ella's presentation at school. By time I got out of the school at 11:00 I barfed in the parking lot. - But there was nothing in my stomach so I just heaved up stomach acid. 

I am anxiously awaiting the energy surge of the second trimester to appear, but I may have to go hunt that down myself.

We have decided to wait to find out the gender until babe is in arms this time. Since you know we've done this before and have everything we need, we figured, why not?

Baby will be in our room to at least six months like all the rest have been, that gives us plenty of time to rearrange as needed. Plus it will be fun to buy some gender neutral layette items.

We still haven't had our mid pregnancy anatomy scan - that won't happen until the end of the month. I'll be 25 weeks then, a bit later than 18 weeks but that's cool with me, I'm in no rush. Thinking about it has made me reminisce about our gender reveal parties we had with the other kiddos. We were having those before the pink or blue icing in the middle of the cake was "in".

Benjamin - Our ultrasound was on 12/30 so we revealed his gender when the clock struck midnight on New Year's. And then called extended family and friends in the middle of the night to share the news.

Ella- we didn't have a party, we had recently moved and didn't know many in the area, we found out at the ultrasound - and she didn't cooperate well, so we left 75% sure it was a girl and had dinner with Aunt Meg. I remember announcing in therapy room the next morning to all my co-workers and patients that I was having a girl. Everyone was so happy for me and said how nice it was that I could be "done" since I had both a boy and a girl. HA on them!!

Maiya - Big shrimp boil with our friends in Va Beach. I remember feeling immediate relief when we found our it was a girl. I was a bit stressed to provide a sister for Ella (silly I know)

Cora - Our first texan baby - we revealed here on video countdown style.

Parker - Our fortune cookie reveal - It was fun to make tons of fortune cookies!

So now I let my mind wander to this baby growing and wonder and enjoy that wonder...

`