Monday, February 06, 2012

8 weeks 5 days... decisions, decisions...

I drove past my midwife's office shortly after moving here in 2006, "Natural Birth Services" was on the building. I wondered if that was a doula or a midwife and made a mental note to research before next pregnancy.

Then I didn't research because I forgot and got pregnant and was so sick I just went with the gyn office I was already at. Jennifer Allen was ok in the ob department, still threatened the BIG baby card and early inductions and my uneducated self was scared and didn't want to be induced so I did what any ol idiot would do I self-induced.

Membranes stripped.
jumping jacks
SPICY food
and every other thing that google will turn up on natural inductions techniques cept for castor oil, because I'd had a baby before and adding diarrhea was not enticing to that process.

So I ended up in the hospital with contractions over two weeks before Cora's due date and ended up on Pitocin... and you know the rest of that story. The first time Kyle and I were alone after her birth I said and I quote:

"If I ever have another baby, I am not going to any hospital"

So when Cora was nine months old I interviewed Pam at Natural Birth Services. I also had phone interviews with Allen Birthing center midwives, Hillary Lyndsey, and two others I can't think of now...

Because I knew that if I waited till there was a positive pregnancy test I'd be too barfy to interview then.

Now between my interview with Pam and actually conceiving PJ - Pam and Hillary combined practices and bought an adorable little house in Sherman and opened a beautiful Birth Center: House of Birth.

Thing is, I didn't want a birth center birth. I wanted a homebirth.

But Pam was awesome and since she lives in Anna she agreed to attend my homebirth.

And it was wonderful!! (Ya'll know that)

Now here I am at baby # 6

And Pam and Hillary's House of Birth is bustling.

And I still don't want a birth center birth.

I kind of think birth centers are like renting a room for your homebirth. All the joys of a homebirth plus other peoples germs.

A freestanding birth center has no more technology than a homebirth midwife brings to your home.

So all the same safety net as a homebirth but you get the added benefit of traveling in labor... no thank you.

and traveling home 4-6 hours after the birth...again  no thank you.

The only way I'd consider a freestanding birth center is if my husband was dead set against a homebirth (actually I'm lucky Kyle is so cool because if my husband was that non-understanding I'd just un-invite him to the birth... "Uncomfortable with a homebirth hunny?" " I'm sorry, but don't come.")

or... if my home was way too far away from a back up hospital.

Add to my fears of a freestanding birth center:

Its not manned at all hours and I don't have a key. Meaning not only do I have to show up I have to trust that I can reach all midwives and that they will show up on time too - ya know to let me in and all.

Hear about the lady who gave birth on the porch at Allen Birthing center. Yeah. I'd be pissed.

At home the worst is we deliver alone. I'd take that any day over delivering on the porch out in the open.

It would seem from emails that Pam and Hillary are very much into their birth center and while they will agree to attend my homebirth would prefer I come to the birthing center.  Financial incentive to do such as well. As Ron White would say "I got a coupin"


so I am in a dilemma...

I don't want my birth reluctantly attended. Not that I think Pam would have that attitude. But if she does have mothers at the birth center and me here birthing at home....

I have an interview with another homebirth midwife so I will see how that goes. Funny its the midwife who ended up on the porch with that mom.

But I have already clicked with Pam.

And a woman of my BMI... once you click with a healthcare provider you tend to stay with said healthcare provider.

Then I have the completely crazy notion of us doing this alone...

I don't think we will. But the thought is there.

The BEST midwife... is as Micheal Odent puts it, an:

 "experienced, low-profile, motherly, and silent midwife... a midwife able to remain silent even when the mother-to-be says silly words, such as, for example, "kill me," "let me die," etc... a midwife who will just make sure that the baby will not fall down on the floor."

 Its hard as I put it to Kyle, I am trying to find someone who will do nothing for me.

That is exactly what I want, no interventions, no unnecessary coaching, having done this 5 times already I don't have any list of questions for prenatal appointments.

So about $4000 to the best person to be there if anything goes wrong. And do nothing when it goes right.

Which it does 98% of the time.

PS. I found the forum where they bashed Cjane for page after page after page for her recent birth.

so sad.

*** disclaimer: I am glad birth centers exist I think they are vastly better than current labor and delivery floors especially if you want natural childbirth - so I am happy they are there.


Amanda said...
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Amanda said...
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Amanda said...
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Hallie said...

Janie, I think you are amazing and know you will pick what is best for you and your little one. I can totally see you following in cjane's footsteps. I look forward to embarking on this journey with you, and can't wait to meet your little one.

Renee Campbell said...

I totally understand your dilemma. We had problems with my third and the right thing for us was unassisted at home, it's such a personal and faith filled journey to take. Pray about it and you will know what is the right route to take. If you have any questions about that I'd love to talk to you about it.

ob said...

And I agree with all of the above. Janie, if you want to actually talk and not just leave blog messages let me now and I will give you a phone number.

Southern OB.