Fight the Power - be happy just the way you are.

gasp... did this beauty queen have real thighs?

Be happy, right now, just the way you are.

easier said than done right? I'd love to see this be an open conversation - what little things do you do to nurture your self esteem?

Instead of the usual conversations women have - Ever notice that? - the majority of conversations amongst women slip to babies (usually about birthing them) and our bodies (usually how much we want to change them - weight loss, sagging boobs, double chins, big rear ends, etc.) Is this the best we have to offer each other in energy and time and words?

So here is my list of things that help me feel better about me - just the way I am:

• Read my scriptures. If I really read them everyday like I should - self doubt, self loathing, and general selfishness is a little bit further away.

• I buy clothes that I LIKE. Not just ones that I think don't make me look fat or hide curves. Look at my header pic up there - you can see my belly ... but I love the dress and guess what? I have a big belly! Who cares. Its a cute dress and I'm going to wear it.

• On the flip side of that if you have clothes that do not make you feel good and your fear of them accentuating all that you do not want accentuated. GET RID OF THEM TODAY. Don't have billboards in your closet of what you should be able to wear if you just lose X amount.
• I try new things with my hair-- a new do or a new way to fix your hair - if its your thing you could try a new color.
• Wear makeup. Treat yourself to a new eye color - look at tutorials on youtube.

• Paint your nails.

• Have an active hobby - something for your hands to do and a place for your mind to wander.

• Exercise. (NOT to punish yourself - but for real joy). Find something that you like and do it. When you train for something only judge yourself against yourself. You want to be better than you were last time. Not better than your neighbor or running buddy. Sometimes being "better" just means being out there doing it - and that is awesome too!

• Nurture your relationships. How do you think your life would be better if you looked EXACTLY the way you wanted to look? Really daydream about it for just a second - then decide what it is that you want in life that you can get now - without changing the way you look. Do you want better relationships - then nurture your relationships... Think you'd have the courage to try new things...
• Pick something new and try it anyway!!

• Find joy in GOOD, real food. Try new recipes.

• Switch to whole grains, eat less meat. Reacquaint yourself with the Word of Wisdom - its more than no coffee, tea, tobacco, or alcohol. PS. it does not say if you follow it you will be skinny. It promises health not societal ideals of beauty.

• Do NOT compete with others. You have NO idea what people's lives are really like. You can't look around a room of women and know who hit the genetic lottery, who makes themselves vomit, who has had plastic surgery, who spends more time on exercise than is wise, who is actually a couch potato, who is going through bankruptcy, etc.... EVERYONE IS FIGHTING a hard battle. Thinking you are better than others or that they are better than you will NEVER make you happy.

• Reduce your time on social media. Remember in the 'sunscreen song' that was so popular when we were in high school? It said "DO NOT read beauty magazines... they will only make you feel ugly." I think a lot of online time-wasters could be substituted there.

• Remind yourself that you are part of a revolution. Society is firmly entrenched in the thin is in - fat is bad mentality. Biggest loser tryouts are in Dallas this week (eyes roll out of my head.) You be different - Live with courage and love, for others and YOURSELF.
• Celebrate the things your body can DO, not what it looks like. Look at your degree on the wall and realize your body and brain helped you do that. Look at your children and realize your body brought them here. Look at your spouse and think of the love that you have shared because of your body. Give credit where credit is due!
• Choosing to live healthy and be happy is LEGENDARY. Rock it girlfriend.

the following are some of my favorite passages from Health at every size...all courtesy of Linda Bacon (yes I see the humor in her last name :)

"Repeat after me: 'My weight is not a problem. Society's problem about weight is the problem.' The true heroes among us are not those who have lost weight. They are the people who move on with their lives, who live PROUD regardless of their weight"

"Know that it is not uncommon for people to feel considerable grief when they first embrace health at every size and recognize the hurt they may have unintentionally caused by believing and promoting weight myths. Show compassion towards yourself: you did the best you could given the information you believed at the time."

"The war on obesity has taken its toll. Extensive "collateral damage" has resulted: Food and body preoccupation, self-hatred, eating disorders, discrimination, poor health... Few of us are at peace with our bodies..."

"Painful as it may be, your friends and family may not come around to support you. You do not have the power to change some one's mind or to make people see the world on your terms. There may not be the perfect argument to catalyze open-mindedness. All you can do is present your truth. And then you can make choices about whom you want to surround yourself with. You are worthy of love. There are people who will enjoy you as you are, who will love and support you, even if you haven't met them yet. Make it a priority to find them."

"Your journey is a long term process of change. You are unlikely to wake up one day and realize you suddenly love and trust your body... Nor will you know how best to respond to friends or acquaintances with concerns about your weight or their own. Focus on a moment to moment awareness, rather than worrying about the big picture."

How about you - what do you do to feel great about yourself despite our current culture?